“Repent
of [Our] Selfishness” (D&C 56:8)
Neal A. Maxwell
Of the Quorum of the
Twelve Apostles
Meekness is the real cure, for it does
not merely mask selfishness but dissolves it!
https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/1999/04/repent-of-our-selfishness-d-c-56-8?lang=eng (Listen/Watch)
In one degree or another
we all struggle with selfishness. Since it is so common, why worry about
selfishness anyway? Because selfishness is really self-destruction in slow
motion. No wonder the Prophet Joseph Smith urged, “Let every selfish feeling be
not only buried, but annihilated” (Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, sel. Joseph Fielding Smith [1976], 178). Hence
annihilation—not moderation—is the destination!
Surging selfishness, for example, has shrunken some people into
ciphers; they seek to erase their emptiness by sensations. But in the
arithmetic of appetite, anything multiplied by zero still totals zero! Each
spasm of selfishness narrows one’s universe that much more by reducing his
awareness of or concern with others. In spite of its outward, worldly swagger,
such indulgent individualism is actually provincial, like goldfish in a bowl
congratulating themselves on their self-sufficiency, never mind the food
pellets or changes of water.
Long ago it took a Copernicus to tell a provincial world that
this planet was not the center of the universe. Some selfish moderns need a
Copernican reminder that they are not the center of the universe either!
The early and familiar
forms of selfishness are: building up self at the expense of others, claiming
or puffing credit, being glad when others go wrong, resenting the genuine
successes of others, preferring public vindication to private reconciliation,
and taking “advantage of one because of his words” (2 Ne. 28:8).
By focusing on himself, a selfish person finds it easier to bear
false witness, to steal, and covet, since nothing should be denied him. No
wonder it is so easy for governments to pander to the appetites of the natural
man, especially if the trains continue to run on time, reassuring him all the
while that his permissiveness is somehow permissible.
Selfishness likewise
causes us to be discourteous, disdainful, and self-centered while withholding
from others needed goods, praise, and recognition as we selfishly pass them by
and notice them not (see Morm. 8:39). Later on come rudeness, brusqueness, and
the further flexing of elbows.
In contrast to the path
of selfishness, there is no room for road rage on the straight and narrow way.
There will be no spouse or child abuse when there is unselfish love at home.
Furthermore, unselfishness is best grown in the family garden, and, likewise,
diligently performing seemingly ordinary Church duties can further help us to
overcome selfishness. The unselfish are also more free. As G. K. Chesterton
said, if we can be interested in others, even if they are not interested in us,
we will find ourselves “under a freer sky, [and] in a street full of splendid
strangers” (Orthodoxy[1959], 21).
In daily discipleship,
the many ways to express selfishness are matched by many ways to avoid it.
Meekness is the real cure, for it does not merely mask selfishness but
dissolves it! Smaller steps could include asking ourselves inwardly before
undertaking an important action, Whose needs am I really trying to meet? Or in significant moments of self-expression, we can first
count to 10. Such thoughtful filtering can multiply our offering by 10 as a
mesh of reflective meekness filters out destructive and effusive ego.
We can also meekly let our ideas have a life of their own
without oversponsoring them. Rather, let the Spirit impel our worthy ideas.
Alas, gross, individual
selfishness is finally acculturated. Then societies can eventually become
without order, without mercy, without love, perverted, and past feeling (see Moro. 9). Society
thereby reflects a grim, cumulative tally which signals a major cultural
decline. This happened anciently when a people actually became “weak, because
of their transgression” (Hel. 4:26). Speaking behaviorally, when what was once
the lesser voice of the people becomes more dominant, then the judgments of God
and the consequences of foolish selfishness follow (see Mosiah 29:26–27).
Cultural decline is
accelerated when single-interest segments of society become indifferent to
general values once widely shared. This drift is facilitated by the indifferent
or the indulgent as society is led carefully down to hell (see 2 Ne. 28:21). Some may not join in this drift, but
instead they step aside, whereas once they might have constrained, as is their
representative right. Of such circumstances Yeats lamented, “The best lack all
conviction, while the worst are full of passionate intensity” (W. B. Yeats,
“The Second Coming”).
Today, in place of some
traditionally shared values is a demanding conformity pushed, ironically, by
those who eventually will not tolerate those who once tolerated them. While
incremental iniquity may not cause a huge decline all at once, the same somber
direction is nevertheless continued, subtly and carefully, with no arousing
jolts or jars (see 2 Ne. 28:21).
Such are some of the proximate consequences
of selfishness, yet some of its consequences are ultimate—impacting us salvationally.
Selfishness is actually the detonator of all the cardinal sins.
It is the hammer for the breaking of the Ten Commandments, whether by
neglecting parents, the Sabbath, or by inducing false witness, murder, and
envy. No wonder the selfish individual is often willing to break a covenant in
order to fix an appetite. No wonder those who will later comprise the telestial
kingdom, after they have paid a price, were once unrepentant adulterers,
whoremongers, and those who both loved and made lies.
Some of the selfish
wrongly believe that there is no divine law anyway, so there is no sin (see 2 Ne. 2:13). Situational ethics are thus made to order
for the selfish. So in the management of self, one can conquer by his genius
and strength, because there really is no crime whatsoever (see Alma 30:17).
Unsurprisingly therefore,
selfishness leads to terrible perceptual and behavioral blunders. For instance,
Cain, corrupted by his seeking of power, said after slaying Abel, “I am free” (Moses 5:33; see also Moses 6:15).
One of the worst
consequences of severe selfishness, therefore, is this profound loss of
proportionality, like straining at gnats while swallowing camels (see Matt. 23:24; see also JST in footnote 24a). Today there are, for
example, those who strain over various gnats but swallow the practice of
partial-birth abortions. Small wonder, therefore, that selfishness magnifies a
mess of pottage into a banquet and makes 30 pieces of silver look like a treasure
trove.
Developmentally, what
transpires is like what happened to an ancient group of children “who did grow
up …, that they became for themselves”—hardened and errant (3 Ne. 1:29; see also 3 Ne. 1:30). Devastating cultural change can and does
happen “in the space of not many years,” including replacing the much-needed
spirit of community with a diversified alliance of dalliance (see Hel. 4:26).
Determined to walk in his
own way, the natural man often persists to the point where he is “past
feeling,” having been sedated by pleasing the carnal mind (see 1 Ne. 17:45; see also Eph. 4:19). Sadly, like the drug addict, he is always
in need of a fresh fix.
The severely selfish use others
but do not love them. Let the Uriahs of the world beware! (see 2 Sam. 11:3–17). Centuries before Christ, the prophet
Jacob warned unchaste men, “Ye have broken the hearts of your tender wives, and
lost the confidence of your children, because of your bad examples before them”
(Jacob 2:35). When love waxes cold, let the poor and the
needy beware too, for they will be neglected, as happened in ancient Sodom (see Matt. 24:12; see also Ezek. 16:49). Strange as it seems, when severely
selfish people are no longer little in their own sight, everybody else shrinks!
(see 1 Sam. 15:17).
Even the early droplets
of selfish decisions suggest a direction. Then the little inflecting rivulets
come, merging into small brooks and soon into larger streams; finally one is
swept along by a vast river which flows into the “gulf of misery and endless
wo” (Hel. 5:12).
We actually have an
obligation to notice genuine, telltale societal signs. It was Jesus who warned,
“O ye hypocrites, ye can discern the face of the sky; but can ye not discern
the signs of the times?” suggesting the need for a different kind of weather
forecasting (Matt. 16:3).
For what happens in cultural decline both leaders and followers
are really accountable. Historically, of course, it is easy to criticize bad
leaders, but we should not give followers a free pass. Otherwise, in their
rationalization of their degeneration they may say they were just following
orders, while the leader was just ordering followers! However, much more is
required of followers in a democratic society wherein individual character
matters so much in both leaders and followers.
The prophet Mormon unselfishly
consented to lead a people who were in steep decline. He prayed for them, but
confided that his prayers were without faith because of the people’s wickedness
(see Morm. 3:12). Other times a visionary leader, like
Joseph in Egypt, lifts people out of the endangered routine they’re in by
preparing them for the specific challenges of the future (see Gen. 41:46–57). A few, like Lincoln, though in a
political role, provide spiritual leadership as well. Lincoln, by the way,
warned of how individuals of ambition and talents would continue to arise and
that such an individual “thirsts and burns for distinction, and if possible …
will have it, whether at the expense of emancipating slaves
or enslaving freemen” (cited in John Wesley
Hill, Abraham Lincoln—Man of God [1927], 74; emphasis in original).
Of unselfish George
Washington it has been written: “In all history few men who possessed
unassailable power have used that power so gently and self-effacingly for what
their best instincts told them was the welfare of their neighbors and all
mankind” (James Thomas Flexner, Washington: The Indispensable Man [1984], xvi).
Power is most safe with those, like Washington, who are not in
love with it! A narcissist society, in which each person is busy looking out
for number one, can build neither brotherhood nor community. Aren’t we glad in
this Easter season and in all seasons that Jesus did not selfishly look out for
number one?
No wonder we have been
told, “Thou shalt have no other
gods before me,” and this includes self-worship! (Ex. 20:3; emphasis added). One way or another, the
grossly selfish will finally be shattered, whimpering, against the jagged,
concrete consequences of their selfishness.
In contrast, as I close, consider unselfish Melissa Howes, whose
comparatively young father died of cancer several months ago. Just before,
Melissa, who was then nine, was voice in family prayer, pleading, “Heavenly
Father, bless my daddy, and if you need him more than us, you can have him. We
want him, but Thy will be done. And please help us not to be mad at you”
(letter from Christie Howes, 25 Feb. 1998).
What spiritual submissiveness for one so young! What an
unselfish understanding of the plan of salvation! May unselfish submissiveness
be our path too, in the holy name of Jesus Christ, amen!
“Selflessness”
cji
8/1/19
Thinking of others
before self
as how the Savior would
do
putting service in
front of wants
becoming unselfish
fully
requires repentance
complete
going forward with a
smile
confidence of whose
mission
whose will to be
filled.
Copyright © 2019 – cji
